Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Mornings are hard

I can't believe how bad I've been feeling in the mornings these past couple of days. Yesterday was particularly bad. I think I was still feeling pretty rotten after the weekend's stresses but it didn't help that I woke up to the smell of Toby frying pork chops. Even before I was pregnant I couldn't stand the smell of meat cooking in the morning but now it's just painful.

All through the morning at work I struggled. I went to have my blood tests done at lunchtime and then in the afternoon I was exhausted. By 3pm I was just praying for it to fast forward to five. My eyes were blurry and it was incredibly difficult to concentrate on anything.

I met Toby at home and he drove to yoga because I don't think I was alert enough to drive. Sherry gave me lots of easy restorative poses to do to help with my nausea and my back. I still kept feeling sick on and off throughout the class. It's the first time yoga hasn't really made me feel better.

Hunger pangs woke me at 5am this morning. I lay in bed for a while trying to ignore them but they weren't so much the "oh I could fancy a bite to eat" kind of pains as the feeling that if I didn't eat soon my stomach would turn itself inside-out and try to escape my body through my mouth in protest. I didn't want that so I dragged myself out of bed and ate a bowl of bran flakes before going back to sleep again.

When I next woke up around 7am I didn't feel as nauseous as yesterday but I did feel tired and light-headed. When I finally dragged myself out of bed my whole body felt as heavy as lead and all my limbs ached. Sherry had suggested that my nausea could be viral and I'm beginning to think she could be right. As I said to Toby this morning, if I wasn't pregnant there is no way I'd consider going to work if I felt like this.

I forced some more breakfast down but it was a struggle. The nausea had set in by this time and I knew I'd feel better after food but it took a while and was a real battle of the wills. I don't think I feel as bad as yesterday morning but I have had some unpleasant moments. I just want to go home and curl up in bed for the rest of the day.

Meanwhile, the project I was worried about still hasn't started as the design agency failed to deliver the HTML on time. In a way it's probably a good thing for me as there is very little chance of us meeting our deadline now so it probably isn't worth me stressing about. I can only do what I can do and if I have to, I'll tell my boss and anyone else who needs to know why I'm not performing. These things can't be helped and my baby is more important than getting the website redesigned by a particular date.

My bras seem to be getting too small for me. I really want to buy some new clothes too but I'm reluctant to get a maternity bra or any large clothes until further into the pregnancy. I may do some shopping at the weekend and get a couple of things to keep me going, including a new hairdryer as my old one blew up last week. I seem unable to regulate my body temperature lately and really feel the cold, which isn't helped by having wet hair in the cold mornings.

Oh and some good news. The cat has thown up on the tiles. It was so much easier to clean up than the carpet. I'm beginning to wonder whether I should take him to the vets as he's doing it a lot lately.

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