People are exceptionally nice to you when you're pregnant. Always asking how you are, whether you're still feeling sick (even though you never told them you were in the first place), incredibly interested in the nursery furniture you may or may not have been spending your money on, making way for you in corridors, commenting upon how difficult it must be climbing four flights of stairs because the lift is out, whilst carrying another person.
Don't get me wrong. I truly believe that pregnant ladies should be given a bit of lee-way. Hormones are crazy things and it's best not to get on the wrong side of them. I should know; two nights ago I found myself miserable and close to tears for no reason other than Toby was making me go back to square one when it comes to buying a car (and there is way too much choice out there; how the hell am I supposed to know which kind I want?) and my dinner wasn't very appetising, despite the fact that I insisted we have fish because I had a feeling the baby needed it. I forced my salmon and veggies down, all the while thinking "I'm not doing this for me." A trip to Mooloolaba to watch a lightening storm whilst eating yummy ice cream soon sorted me out, even if we did flatten Mitsi's battery and get soaked phoning RACQ and trying to get someone to jump-start her. Personally, I think she might have heard the conversation we'd had earlier in the night and thought to herself, "hmmm, so they think they can just replace me with a Forester, do they? Well, not before I have a bit of fun."
So, yes, by all means I think people should go easy on me if I seem forgetful, or take a few hours off work for ante-natal appointments or sleep, or make a silly mistake. In short, they shouldn't be mean. But the level of niceness, and sudden interest in me and my wellbeing, that seems to have taken control of many of my colleagues (except for those I sit with and see every day, who have thankfully remained normal and still take the piss out of me when warranted) is actually beginning to creep me out. Perhaps it's because I know it's not actually me that they're interested in and concerned about.
Career versus motherhood
I love the fact that my baby comes everywhere with me. It feels so safe having it tucked away inside of me and knowing that I can trust my body to look after it and do all the right things. I can pretty much go anywhere and do anything and know that AJ is safe. S(he) is being fed the right foods, never needs changing, never cries, puts him/herself to sleep, amuses him/herself when s(he)'s awake. This is definitely the easiest part of motherhood.
That said, there are times when I look forward to not having to bring him to work with me every day. There is nothing so disconcerting when you're deeply engrossed in a programming problem, or putting forward an opinion in a meeting when all of a sudden you feel the squirmer wriggling around, forcing you to sit up, as though it's going "hey mam, I'm getting a bit squished here you know. Give me some room, will ya?".
It must trigger some mothering hormones or something because the maternal instincts suddenly kick in and you start wondering when you should start decorating the nursery and should you have bought that sling you've been thinking of getting for a while now from EBay, and thinking of which, oh darn-it you've let that auction for the Baby Love book end without getting a bid in. All professionalism goes out of the window. You glance at your belly, convinced that your co-workers can see it moving and think that some alien-like creature is going to burst out of it at any moment. You want to giggle and say to them "hahaha, did you see that? AJ is obviously incredibly enthused by this conversation. He's wriggling around all over the place."
Speaking of which, AJ was going nuts the other night. My uterus is now pretty much right up to my ribs so depending on where AJ is and which position I'm in I can see him squirming around making my belly do funny things that a belly-dancer would be proud of. S(he) had me in fits of giggles the other night. It doesn't just look funny but it feels really funny too. I asked the midwife yesterday if she could feel where the baby was lying but she said it's still too small and they move around a lot at this stage anyway. She said they could be in one position and within seconds have flipped over and be somewhere else entirely. Well, don't I know it. One minute I'll be feeling movements in the middle of my abdomen above my belly button and the next thing the bub has stretched right out and is kicking me above my right groin.
Speaking of groins, because I always like a nice segueway from one topic to another, I woke up on Saturday with an uncomfortable dull pain in my left groin and a similar pain in the corresponding region of my back. I wore my belly band for an hour then went to yoga and it wore off. It flared up again on Monday and Tuesday and I noticed that I could feel a ridge as though a muscle was all enflamed. Well, it turns out it's the ligament that connects to my uterus. It's just getting a little freaked out by all the extra weight it's carrying. I rested on Wednesday and Thursday and felt fine but obviously I can't stop exercising for the rest of my pregnancy so I saw my physio this morning and she gave me some stretches and some strengthening exercises. I have to stretch and strengthen my deep hip flexors and the strength exercises are weird because they're really subtle. We discussed how I can incorporate this into every day life and what things I should be aware of, which exercises are good and which ones I should be careful with. I'll probably talk to Sherry about it in yoga tomorrow too.
Yoga and cravings
Lucie has been unable to get into my yoga class which is a real shame but Sherry has so many pregnant ladies coming to her now that she's decided to put on an extra class so Lucie will join that one. Hopefully in a few weeks we'll be able to merge the classes but for now I'll be with other girls due the same time as me (there are about five of us due in the same fortnight) and the same should happen for Lucie too. I was most reassured last night at dinner when Lucie told me she has also been suffering from sweet cravings and went on to list all the goodies she'd had for morning tea that day. I thought "wow, that's a lot" but her list continued! I was feeling bad for having had 3 chocolate biscuits that morning (which made me feel sick) followed by the yummiest dessert of chocolate crispy ravioli last night but now I know I'm not the only one. Only Lucie's indulgences didn't make her feel sick; on the contrary she said, "I felt great!"